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Pessimist – Indian Jokes, Hindi Jokes

Pessimist – Indian Jokes, Hindi Jokes

An optimist sees the best in the world, while a pessimist sees only
the worst. An optimist finds the positive in the negative, and a
pessimist can only find the negative in the positive.

For example, an avid duck hunter was in the market for a new bird dog.
His search ended when he found a dog that could actually walk on water
to retrieve a duck. Shocked by his find, he was sure none of his
friends would ever believe him.

He decided to try to break the news to a friend of his, a pessimist by
nature, and invited him to hunt with him and his new dog.

As they waited by the shore, a flock of ducks flew by. they fired, and
a duck fell. The dog responded and jumped into the water. The dog,
however, did not sink but instead walked across the water to retrieve
the bird, never getting more than his paws wet. This continued all day
long; each time a duck fell, the dog walked across the surface of the
water to retrieve it.

The pessimist watched carefully, saw everything, but did not say a
single word.

On the drive home the hunter asked his friend, “Did you notice
anything unusual about my new dog?”

“I sure did,” responded the pessimist.
“Your dog can’t swim”

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Student Vs Professor – Indian Jokes, Hindi Jokes

Student Vs Professor

After having failed his exam in “Logistics and Organization” , a student goes and confronts his lecturer about it.

Student: “Sir, do you really understand anything about the subject?”

Professor: “Surely I must. Otherwise I would not be a professor!”

Student: “Great, well then I would like to ask you a question.

If you can give me the correct answer, I will accept my mark as is and go. If you however do not know the answer, I want you give me an “A” for the exam. “

Professor: “Okay, it’s a deal. So what is the question?”

Student: “What is legal, but not logical, logical, but not legal, and neither logical, nor legal?”

Even after some long and hard consideration, the professor cannot give the student an answer, and therefore changes his exam mark into an “A”, as agreed.

Afterwards, the professor calls on his best student and asks him the same question.

He immediately answers: “Sir, you are 63 years old and married to a 35 year old woman, which is legal, but not logical. Your wife has a 25 year old lover, which is logical, but not legal. The fact that you have given your wife’s lover an “A”, although he really should have failed, is neither legal, nor logical.”

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COMPUTOR WIZARD (joke )

Abdul was having trouble with his computer. So Abdul called Jaffer,
the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission Control
and asked him to come over.
Eric clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem.

As he was walking away, I
Abdul called after him,
‘So, what was wrong?
He replied, ‘It was an ID ten T error.’

Abdul didn’t want to appear stupid,
but nonetheless inquired,
‘An, ID ten T error? What’s that?
In case I need to fix it again.’

Jaffer grinned….
‘Haven’t you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?’

‘No,’ Abdul replied.
‘Write it down,’ said Jaffer,
‘and I think you’ll figure it out.’

So Abdul wrote down:

I D 1 0 T

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Indian Jokes, Hindi Jokes

This woman dies, and when she gets to heaven she asks Saint Peter, “Would it be possible for me to get together with my dear departed husband? He died many years ago.” Saint Peter asks, “What’s his name?”
“John Smith,” replies the woman.

“Gee,” says Saint Peter, “we’ve got a lot of John Smiths up here. But sometimes we can identify people by their last words. Do you happen to remember what his last words were?”

The woman thinks for a moment, then says, “Oh yes! I remember them! He said that if I ever slept with another man after he was gone, he would roll over in his grave.”

“Oh!” says Saint Peter. “You mean Whirling John Smith!”
____________ _____

The Minister
JokesWareHouse

The Minister

A minister waited in line to have his car filled with gas just before a
long holiday weekend.

The attendant worked quickly, but there were many cars ahead of him in
front of the service station.

Finally, the attendant motioned him toward a vacant pump.

“Reverend,” said the young man: “Sorry about the delay. It seems as if
everyone waits until the last minute to get ready for a long trip.”

The minister chuckled: “I know what you mean. It’s the same in my business.”

************ **
MountainWings – No Enemies
Issue # 8037

No Enemies

The minister’s sermon went on and on about how important it was to forgive
people and

reach out to them so as not to make enemies.

“Is there anyone in this church who can honestly say they have no enemies?”
asked the

minister.

Not a hand went up. But a few moments later, a very elderly lady in the
back row raised her

frail little hand.

“Please, come up and tell us what you have done over all these years that
you can be so

confident you have no enemies,” asked the minister.

Dutifully the old woman limped up to the front of the church where she
explained: “I outlived ’em all.”